Lunatic Thirteens

We dressed up for the funeral in our nicest borrowed clothes
I put on dress shoes that I stole and ran out
And we made way through the roundabouts of a gray suburban town
The snow was scattered on the ground and I thought
Before you left did you say all you wanted to?
Before you died did you do all you meant to do?
Could you look it in the eyes when it came for you?
Tell me how it ends
Cause you lived like a tightrope walker
While I was on a phone call somewhere else
When you fell I couldn’t catch you
I was getting drunk all by myself
And the hardest part was to show up here at all
As I listened to your eulogy from that priest you didn’t know
I half wrote letters to your nonexistent ghost
Hey Jazmine are you listening? I know I never return calls
But if you’re there at all just tell me
Was it just the dope that failed you
Or did everything just let you down?
Is there a way I could have saved you
If I was there would you still be around?
The hardest things just can’t be known at all
I don’t know the whole truth
But I know a piece was buried with you