Spite

At the core
I despise myself
Outside opinions and stinging precision:
I despise myself
Strings winding through my skin
Direct me
Connected to a grin
I’m forcing
I really hate what I’m saying
Send all my memories back with all the things
I don’t deserve
Distraught dark thoughts back on
I’m found frail
Feeling like a walking stigma
Lacking self esteem
Finite fail
Am I the only one against me
Trusting a disease?
Dark thoughts back on
A little darker this time
Anticipation of rejection
I’m holding hands with self-doubt
Hide the stigma
I was not always this way
Harem scare 'em!
Send back all the things
I’ll only burn
Watch me walking backwards
I’m found frail
Finite fail
Am I only one against me
Trusting a disease
As I despise myself?
I despise myself