Miss Teen USA

Miss Teen USA South Carolina
Had something to say in her pearls and eye-liner
Something to say to the world out there
The world beyond Charleston, a world full of care
But the words wouldn’t work, they were badly behaved
And her something to say just couldn’t be saved.
Miss Teen USA, South Carolina
In a gingham bikini, a long way from China
Stamps her neat foot to wake up the U.S.
And takes up her sword, the pageant princess
Then the words start to fall, into places they fit
And a crowd gathers round, all lickety-spit
They have pride on their minds and taxes to kill
And they’re taking their anger to Capitol Hill
Miss Teen USA, South Carolina
Won’t take out the trash or work in a diner
She leads from the front in her dream to restore
What she dreams that her country enjoyed years before
And the words start to whip, and the crowds starts to shriek
‘Health care and welfare, it just makes us weak'
And they’re sure of their maker, and sure of their rights
They have Gabrielle Giffords trained in their sights
And spare me the law-suit, spare the sermon
There’s always a crowd behind every lone gunman.
In the land of the free, nothing is finer
Than a stumbling speech from Miss Teen USA, South Carolina