Lawn Full of Marigolds

I moved myself west to find a philosophy
To learn my geography at best
Where the mountains are cold
The rain drops it’s tears, i’m told
Amongst the ashes a heart of gold, they say
I guess it’s best to imagine it that way
So i bought me a book to teach me the ways of god
To open my tarnished heart from it
Started praisin' the lord & talkin' in tongues & code;
I did repairs on that broken road back home
I guess it’s better than being alone
And now to death: i’m dying
To love: i’m trying
To god: i’m lying again
And to my ma: i’ve failed you
To my pa: i (always) blamed you
And to god: i have shamed you again
So i moved myself out, i pictured a better home-
A lawn full of marigolds, i guess
I headed back east, started thinking my hope away
Depression was the one to stay since then
Now, i take pills to push it from my head
Yes, i take pills to push it from my head
And now to death: i’m dying
To love: i’m trying
To god: i’m lying again
And to my ma: i’ve failed you
To my pa: i (always) blamed you
And to god: i have shamed you again
To god: i have shamed you again
To god: i have shamed you again
Again