Grandma Jimmy

She likes to take them to Devon for a picnic, bringing tin foil wrapped tuna
white bagel sandwiches dripping in ample butter which had gotten gloopy because
she almost-
Because she almost-
Because she almost-
Dead smelling dog’s warm belly, had passed out on her husband’s bought basket —
who was now dead
In the boot of the car, the dog was feeling carsick, and so was everybody else,
except for Jimmy of course, because she was driving. Her driving was awful!
Granny J slowed down every time she spoke which pissed everybody off.
Although they loved her, she was very, very annoying. She just spoke about
things she had already said, like, to the point where everyone concerning her
slayed by fate could smell the off yoghurt from the fridge, wafting into the
living room
When they got to the beach, Jack, the youngest, felt depressed, because he
hated pebbly beaches and was expecting a sandy one. After the shock of his
realisation, he couldn’t resist himself and said out loud
«Fuck! I want to get back to London, like, now!»
Jimmy snapped back
«You ugly, fat, brat. You may leave after I have photographed you.»