Trick (Skit)

Cardi B: Yo, what is your problem? Why you knocking on the door like that?
You know my uncle on the run. You — I thought you was the police
Haitian V: Cardi, why you keep me waiting like that all the time?
The garbage man — they — they asked me if I live here, I say no
Why you leave me outside like that?
Cardi B: You see that’s why I told you I’m only available before 8PM
Before the stores closing. When you gonna take me shopping again?
Like I keep wearing the same outfit over and over again
Look at my nails, look at my toes like
Haitian V: You need your nails done, I give you the money
You want your toes done, I give you the money
You want your hair — I go to Malaysia to get it for you
No problem. The diamonds in your fingers
You don’t know who help me get that
Leonardo DiCaprio from Blood Diamond help me to get that for you
They tell Beyoncé and Kim Kardashian — they say listen it’s only one
And it has to go to Haitian for him to give it to his girlfriend
Cardi B: Nobody tell you to do all that
You coulda — you coulda went to Foredom
You coulda went to Foredom and get a goddamn ring
Haitian V: Let’s stop this — this garbage foolishness. Okay baby?
Cardi B: What I told you about calling me baby?
Like don’t call me baby
I don’t like when you call me baby like you
Just make us look crazy in public, like stop calling me that
Stop calling me that
Haitian V: Cardi
Cardi B: Don’t call me baby
Haitian V: Cardi, why you talking about I can’t call you baby?
What I’m supposed to call you? Homie
Haitian V: Nigga? I don’t know what I’m supposed to call you —
Cardi B: I’m a f*cking punch him. This is why I need another one
Haitian V: Baby, what you grumbling to yourself like that?
I buy you I pay the rent
I pay your cell phone, not even my cell phone
Cardi B: Alright, alright!
Haitian V: I treat you good, I buy you eh stuff
Cardi B: Oh my God!
Haitian V: And then you treat me like garbage baby
Cardi B: I already told you already, because you’s a you’s a