Carousel of Descent

How you stand there so proud and beautiful
Beside the black me, the sick and helpless one
True gentle caring, natural and undemanding
A childish wish you’ll see me through the night
I’ve seen them staring at me, even through the tears
The world’s descending for a foolish boy in fear
I keep all doors shut, I endure this bitter guilt
I know they blame me but that’s one thing I can take, right!
I can take it!
I wish that every single tear I shed was felt and seen by you
So you would understand how much you are and mean to me
I am so weak and tired, drugged somehow and sinking
Fevered and uncared for, strangely not even self-pitied
Thoughts spinning, swirling, carousel of misadaption
A freak of nature on the ride of a lifetime, yes, that’s me
The more I try to fight the deeper I’m descending
No use in trying crashing headfirst towards the ground
It has to end somewhere, I’ve known it would and here it is
This carousel, descending, had its' purpose and it was you
How you stand there so proud and beautiful
Beside the black me, the sick and helpless one
True gentle caring, natural and undemanding
A childish wish you’ll see me through it all
I’ve seen them staring at me, even through the tears
The world’s descending for a foolish boy in fear
I keep all doors shut, I endure this bitter guilt
I know they blame me but that’s one thing I can take
I can take it!