My British Tour Diary

On our trip to England I noticed something obscene
People still actually give a shit about the Queen
Though London girls aren’t snobs at all
and Brighton’s lovely in the Fall
Left alone to drive ourselves on the opposite side
Man it was a miracle that nobody died
Hanging out with Steven Drew, Theo,
Paul and Sorrel too
Eating at Welcome Breaks daily
We danced in Leeds with Brit Pop Haley
Performing with the Apples
and then crashing at the Wrights
Bitching because Steven booked us on such early flights
Always in a foggy haze
because we hadn’t slept for days
Every single one of our London cabbies played
The most truly repellent techno music ever made
But they’ll drop you without hesitation if you try changing the station
Up to our necks in crisps and litter
in the van we dubbed the Gary Glitter