Pork Soda

Now, listen up, you know, ya come home from that nine-to-five and lay yourself
down on that burgundy couch, you know, it never really was burgundy
It was red, and you painted with the goddamn sprinkler and now you have bits
and pieces of burgundy stuck to your butt every time you get off of it
You never tell your family, you never tell your family because, you know,
ol' Junior, he’s got no brains, and what can you do? What can you do?
Grab yourself a can of pork soda
You’ll be feeling just fine
Ain’t nothin' quite like sittin' 'round the house
Swillin' down them cans of swine
Ha ha ha! Yes, Dad’s an idiot alright!
Well, alright, I’m really starting to worry about you. You had to have that
two-car garage with the large driveway so you could park that goddamn boat in
it. If it wasn’t for the boat (blah blah blah)
Grab yourself a can of pork soda
You’ll be feeling just fine
Ain’t nothin' quite like sittin' 'round the house
Swillin' down them cans of swine
Yeah, cans of swine
I like cans of swine
I like cans of swine
Not like Kansas wine
Well, maybe it’s something simpler, you know, like your team lost or your
girlfriend used to be a guy, you know, I don’t know. I mean…(blah blah blah)