Jolly Executioner

It said his blade weighed half a tonne
O' Spanish steel, Christ how it shone
With a whistle & thump yer dash were done
And the axe cared not for who you were
He kept a cell below the tower
Where he signed the cross every half an hour
With a calf skin drum & a rattle tat taa
The Jolly Executioner
He had a son, a drunken sailor
Coulda been a Tinker, Tyke, or tailor
Sailed away to far Australia
To be the executioner
His rope were short, his knots were tight
He’d plait the hemp by candle light
With a crack & twang ye bade goodnight
To the Jolly Executioner
String em high & stretch em well
Burn a candle, strike a bell
Pipe their rotten souls to hell
For the Jolly Executioner
Then some bloke with a kite & key
Invented electricity
And the job were handed down to me
So fortunate you wish you were
I’ve cooked em all, the crooks & crumbs
The vagabonds & hapless bums
With a crackle & pop, 'Ol' Sparky' sung
For the Jolly Executioner
I had a son, near broke me heart
A stand alone, a breed apart
Brought death unto a dying art
A general Practitioner
All white lab coats & PHD’s
And 10cc's of anti-freeze
A noble art brought to its knees
Farewell to the Executioner